Spoof Reading

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The Erect Vessel
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Re: Spoof Reading

Post by The Erect Vessel » Mon Mar 12, 2018 1:48 am

Well see, just contemplating in a deep way (One's navel actually) and remembering how my father who was a very good card carrying peeblet stating - and it being said as hugely funny in his opinion - about when 'a matter occurs' and in my simple language the brethies have been busted - he stated the thing to do, was raise a huge cloud of dust and beat a hasty retreat!

I found it decidedly unfunny and thought in modern day terms - indeed a link - as we love links. Linked with the TV series Suits which for those of us who have the TV hidden in the loft and subscribe to Netflix see some behaviour that reminds me of the brethren to a T.
Louis Litt and Harvey Spector perfect examples of dirty underhanded cheating peeblets; gave me the creeps thinking back on all the behaviour that goes on in peebland, and what I was once a part of.. euch!

In fact, as One closes One's book, would just have to humbly confess that One thinks that there is something in that for all of us.

And hence endeth the lesson,

Amen

The Erect Vessel
Posts: 496
Joined: Fri Feb 22, 2013 2:19 am
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Re: Spoof Reading

Post by The Erect Vessel » Tue May 08, 2018 10:32 am

I've been reading all about this matter in New Zealand; hate these Kiwis; they are an abomination unto Jehovah and all the cause of the breakdown in society in the western world as our or is it The or is it ... oh bugger it 'Our Beloved Grumpy Bum JSH' would say. Gee he was a happy man wasn't he...not?

Anyway he said... something, and it was astounding. Incredible. Inscrutable,and Divine.

It wasn't ineffable, ( as an aside that is my favourite crossword clue - unable to be sworn).

Now I hope you are all following this as it is very deep. We like deep matters. And deep issues. Very deep.

But see, see in New Zealand we need to stand together because ... like Aberdeen... it never happened because nah ne nahe ne nah nah our beloved ...oops or was it the beloved ...no that was his daddy...no, there is no, and once more no as the subconscious mind believes things said to it three times in quick succession, nepotism...nepotism, (doesn't it sound impressive when you emphasize things twice or three times eh?) in the things of God I'll have you know and Gareth won't necessarily be the next Universal Lead, but if he ain't, you ha better mind you f***ing business because we will take it and take you down as well, and hide our tracks, because we are The Church.

Anyway One has seen our Beloved Brother inquiring on how easy is it to move to Fiji? He is inquiring obviously on behalf of the young people. Not that the Caymans is a bad option either...tax advantages there. Always Barbados but you might bump into a few Huntes or Emtages or things like that there.. Jamaica? Hmm.. Donald Duck he lived there and it is a bit hot compared to downtown Sydney.... umm.. what about London eh? Alan Bond did ok there eh? We could take in West End Shows and hob nob with Elton ...ooh no on second thoughts Gareth might get ideas there...mm..any ideas young flockers?

twotimothytwo
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Re: Spoof Reading

Post by twotimothytwo » Mon May 14, 2018 1:29 pm

Is it true that the New Zealand Rugby Team will now be known as the All Browns?

Sean Fitzpatrick?

The Erect Vessel
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Re: Spoof Reading

Post by The Erect Vessel » Tue May 15, 2018 12:31 am

No no 2T2 You are thinking of Patrick Fitzgerald who was the perfect example of what you were alluding to in a federal connection, speaking reverently. :shock:

The Erect Vessel
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Re: Spoof Reading

Post by The Erect Vessel » Sun May 27, 2018 2:53 am

B.F.C.Was thinking blub bevren of something that has been raised privately with those of us carrying responsibility and thought that wisdom's children would raise this at this time in these last days before the rapture takes place, in regards to worldly music and whether for the sake of the young we could allow worldly music not just to be played in our own homes but to take it to a wider audience as it were, as there are some very talented young brothers amongst us.
A.L.Jr.. Would there also be room for the young sisters to be included in the exercise that you are raising?
B.F.C. Well of course you have to understand that the sisters place is truly in the home. Bringing up the children is a great and worthwhile without forgetting tremendous responsibility.
A.L. Jr.. Of course of course I'm sorry...I was just inquiring of course just inquiring for the sake of the young so that they would be clear. Were you thinking that there could be some commercialism of this matter?
B.F.C. Well now you are getting some help, as clearly the Testimony requires money. The Lord see was a practical businessman wasn't he..See, he was not just a carpenter, he would have been off the tools for sure working on his business and not in his business. And today is no different, he would have been a great delegator and worked at things; real things see. See, you can't deny that there is a lot of money in the music business and I think they call it "I" Tunes or something like that. You young brothers would know and if we had some of these talented young brothers went to work on producing music perhaps someone in UBT could lend a helping hand is what wisdom would say for sure, then there might be something in that to work through to a critical end as it were. What do you think Mr Slackarse over there?
S.A.IIIrd I think that is a wonderful matter and exercise you raise, but the challenge to us all I'm sure would be whether we can take up the challenge that the lord has raised and work it through to a practical result. Were you thinking we could start off with recording something along the lines of "The squaws along the Yukon"?
B.F.C. No no no no no... Tch tch we have moved on since these days..
S.A.IIIrd. "Tie me kangaroo down sport" then?
B.F.C. Look we will leave this to those carrying things in our own local areas and I don't think you are quite at with what the lord is stating here so clearly.. (grrr Rolf Harris the dirty little pedophile....we have had too many of them around here as it is and between you and me and for goodness sakes don't tell anyone but Jimbo the Pure P***head was one for sure)

fisherman
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Re: Spoof Reading

Post by fisherman » Fri Jun 01, 2018 3:46 pm

Some of us might remember the 'minstrel'(talked funny and wore a kilt)who 'altered for correctness''Tie me kangaroo down sport'.Great tribute to Bruce,I'm sure he would be flattered...if you don't think so, best keep it to yourself and gush anyway( the saints always gush over their leaders and tell little stories about them ...guess they like the flattery...)

Like many ,he was faithful to 'Our Beloved' but fell afoul of the pig farmer ( he was one of ' These Great Men' in an unbroken line from Paul on down to the present day' ,Devinely Accredited and don't forget- none of his words fell to the ground') so there is defintately some talent amongst us, and perhaps ,uh,what's that chaps name again?-you know the one everybody has to 'sit, stand stand,jump up and turn yourselves about' game the saints play these days ....yes, I think we could turn this talent into a real money making business opportunity, maybe even have a 'Grand Old Opry ' that the saints could attend-bring all your friends and neighbours just like we used to invite people into the gospel meetings ( it would be an individual excercise of course) but don't expect any reduction in the tickets( this is business-OK?) ..refreshments will be provided by the RRT...

twotimothytwo
Posts: 1481
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Re: Spoof Reading

Post by twotimothytwo » Fri Jun 01, 2018 5:31 pm

We've (PBCC) already tried the music thing, but it didn't seem to take off......more of a one hit wonder!

http://www.northerntalents.com/

Is it only Vancouverites that talk proper?

The Erect Vessel
Posts: 496
Joined: Fri Feb 22, 2013 2:19 am
Location: Not la la land

Re: Spoof Reading

Post by The Erect Vessel » Mon Jun 04, 2018 2:33 pm

Well see. It was the marketing thing. Been getting some tips from my friend Tony...no no no not that Tony Tony Robbins...he knows how to spellbind people and lock 'em in rooms until they pull out their credit cards and he maxes them out easy peasey.

We just need some up and coming young brothers to take this thing on and as surely as surely the lord will come in for them in a peculiar way 2T2. Honest you have to believe me. You have to understand that when UbewT get behind things as long as it is not Gareth who is behind you :o then who can be against us eh!

Marketers that is what we need. Who is up for the challenge?

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