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 Post subject: Re: Spoof Reading
PostPosted: Mon Jul 17, 2017 6:05 am 
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Joined: Fri Feb 22, 2013 2:19 am
Posts: 395
Location: Snidey
Well while One does not feel guilty in any way, One feels that although One doesn't attend many meetings these days...too busy carrying the cares of the Testymoney and feeling things deeply however One felt behooved and behoven to take the Reading today:-
All rise...(as One comes in wondering whether One put One's belt above or below the belly today, or teetered it nervously in the middle hoping it wouldn't slip either way...ahh the exercises One carries)
(Ah a sister has screeched out a Hymn...'

How good is the Dog we adore,
Our faithful unfashionable friend,
His money is as great as his belly
Which knows neither measure nor end.

For Daddums is the first and the last;
Johnnie Blue will guide us safe home;
We'll praise him before we all get p***ed
And trust me for all that's to come.

As One moves slowly and pensively to One's feet to prey

Goneandfar we prey on the brethren in New Zealand and we prey that the good government that thou hast seen fit to elect there mightenest be maintained in a way peculiar unto thineself, and (serious cough) that there may be some individual exercise taken on in a suffering way, and we know that thou canst not be beholden to what is of man, of the devil in that sense, but canst do anything indeed turn the hearts of men, at this time, ah, and in a way that may cause brethren to do what has never been done before and vote in the coming erections.
And we prey for other governments too..the United States of America and our beloved brother Donald Chump, and how he is feeling things at this time and we prey that we mightenest be beholden of some of his crazy ideas and money, and we prey on the saints in Britain too that they might be moved in relation to Brexit, and if they are unsure to give more financially wise to what The Lord is abundantly blessing the RRT and UBT gravy train may continue to sucker the Charity Parishioners and dupe the governments successfully around the Universe.
In the name of my old daddums
Amen.

Now for a Scripture...


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 Post subject: Re: Spoof Reading
PostPosted: Mon Jul 17, 2017 7:39 am 
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Joined: Fri Feb 22, 2013 2:19 am
Posts: 395
Location: Snidey
I think we should read a verse from Job 14 3-18, and one from Hezekiah 1 verses 7 and 8 , and one from Luke 6 the first stanza and one in 2 Timothy 2 and verse 1 - 16, and just felt see that if we could see, if we saw, and if we could see, see, see clearly that there is a link between these 3 scriptures
O.P. That is actually 4 scriptures... not that I am trying to contradict you, as who would do that? Only a fool would position themselves up against whats Erect in our day...(oh mummy what have I done!!! sweating big drops of blood eek)
E.V. Well, (as One feels extremely gracious) you have to understand that anyways we read the Old Testament in the light of the New Testament.
O.P. Oh wow! What a revelation - never heard that before...would that link in anyway with what your father - our beloved beloved brother said back I think it was in May 1964 that The Lord was going through in triumph. He was clear wasn't he! Very clear!
E.V. Oh clearly. He would be saying the same thing today as we are saying today.
O.P. Oh yes he was very clear about worldly associations and shorts and the legs of a horse or summat like that, oh and clear alcohol - no voddies or gins for the sisters eh? And, and computers was he clear was he ever clear about that eh...it was old Pigster he got his knickers in a knot over that didn't he, but we would be buggered without computers these days eh, and well we don't need faxes now ...see your daddy was clear about them eh! Duck into the neighbours to send a fax... for fax sakes...he was brilliant your daddy was too ...knew all about science and dinosaurs and that...by the way when did God invent the dinosaurs?


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 Post subject: Re: Spoof Reading
PostPosted: Mon Jul 17, 2017 8:54 pm 
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Joined: Thu Mar 10, 2016 9:14 pm
Posts: 19
Ooooo Blub Erect - all those see's really do it for me....here's a him for us to all sing along to... see...


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FscIgtDJFXg


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 Post subject: Re: Spoof Reading
PostPosted: Mon Jul 17, 2017 9:24 pm 
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Joined: Sat Feb 23, 2013 8:04 am
Posts: 1306
Let us sing that hymn, How Great We Are!

Oh Man of God, when I in awesome wonder
Consider all the money we have made,
I see in tears of families torn asunder
Our power throughout the meeting room displayed.

Then sings my soul oh Man of God to thee
How great we are! How great are we!
Then sings my soul oh Man of God to thee
How great we are! How great are we!

And while we walk the path of separation
We see mankind sink deeper into sin,
Shortly to face the torments of damnation
Except for us; I scarce can take it in.

So sings my soul oh Man of God to thee
How great we are! How great are we!
So sings my soul oh Man of God to thee
How great we are! How great are we!

When Christ shall come and we the Church are raptured
Leaving behind a world of sin and woe,
We shall look down at those the Foe has captured,
And shake our heads and say we told you so.

And then we’ll sing for evermore to thee
How great we are! How great are we!
And then we’ll sing for evermore to thee
How great we are! How great are we!


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 Post subject: Re: Spoof Reading
PostPosted: Mon Jul 17, 2017 11:08 pm 
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Joined: Sun May 12, 2013 3:22 pm
Posts: 2466
Didn't our blub brother Mr Chaucer say in a'The Cooks Tale' that there is 'more truth spoken in jest' ? Sounds 'authoritative ' to me ...


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 Post subject: Re: Spoof Reading
PostPosted: Tue Jul 18, 2017 6:32 am 
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Joined: Sat Feb 23, 2013 8:04 am
Posts: 1306
Many authors in various ways have said that many a true word is spoken in jest.

Quote:
Redentem dicere verum quid vetat
Horace in Satires (35 BC)

Quote:
But yet I pray thee be not wroth for game;
A man may say full sooth in game and play.
Geoffrey Chaucer in the Cook’s tale

Quote:
Jesters do oft prove prophets
William Shakespeare in King Lear

Quote:
in risu veritas
James Joyce

Jim Taylor sometimes introduced a new rule as a joke initially, and then repeated it in a more serious form. I suppose that left him with plausible deniability, or the option of backtracking if the Brethren collectively rebelled. When he died, some of his new rules had not yet progressed beyond the joke stage, and were never obeyed.


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 Post subject: Re: Spoof Reading
PostPosted: Tue Jul 18, 2017 2:13 pm 
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Joined: Sun May 12, 2013 3:22 pm
Posts: 2466
Too bad we didn't respond in like manner,grab our bellies and laugh at them -'you want me to do WHAT?'....funny,these pumped up despots don't LIKE being laughed at....but they had no trouble singling out people and laughing at THEM....yeah, I saw how that brash arrogant 'know it all' Bruce Hales treated the brethren in 65...and it certainly wasn't with respect...never forgot it,why we ever let the scoundrels( or their spawn) back in power again ,I will never know...can't say we didn't know...


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 Post subject: Re: Spoof Reading
PostPosted: Wed Jul 19, 2017 5:58 am 
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Joined: Thu Feb 21, 2013 4:23 am
Posts: 569
Location: Omnipresent
Love the song Ian.

Much more to it than the one I heard them singing last week:

Jesus wants me to drink whisky,
To drink some drams each day;
In every way try to down some,
At home, at school, at play.

Some whisky, some whisky,
Jesus wants me to drink whisky;
Some whisky, some whisky,
I'll drink some whisky for Him.

Jesus wants me to be drunken,
And pissed to all I see;
Showing how pleasant and happy
A whisky drinker can be.

Some whisky, some whisky,
Jesus wants me to drink whisky;
Some whisky, some whisky,
I'll drink some whisky for Him.

I will ask Jesus to help me,
To keep my Scotch from gin;
Ever reflecting His preference,
And always drink whisky for Him.

Some whisky, some whisky,
Jesus wants me to drink whisky;
Some whisky, some whisky,
I'll drink some whisky for Him.

I'll drink some whisky for Jesus;
I can if I but try;
Drinking Scotch moment by moment,
Then live with Him whilst high.

Some whisky, some whisky,
Jesus wants me to drink whisky;
Some whisky, some whisky,
I'll drink some whisky for Him.


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 Post subject: Re: Spoof Reading
PostPosted: Wed Jul 19, 2017 7:09 am 
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Joined: Fri Feb 22, 2013 2:19 am
Posts: 395
Location: Snidey
:lol: :lol: :lol:


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